Intimacy - The "I" word!

Here is a scary thought...... "INTIMACY"... for some people it really is no big deal, to them intimacy is superficial, shallow, and non-committal. To others it is the big "I" word! It is what we all at some level long for...I know I do. I see my need for intimacy simply because of the absence of it in my life for so long. There does exist a struggle between my desire for intimacy and my fear of it. Intimacy makes me vulnerable. The more I desire intimacy the more vulnerable I must make myself in order to receive it. That's the scary part... and therein lies the rub, the catch 22.

Terry Hershey says that "intimacy is not a destination or a possession or a status. Intimacy is a journey." It is a journey I must be willing to take if I am going to find happiness. This is not optional this is a must. I need intimacy. I needed it with the Lord, and there I received the most pure kind of intimacy, I needed it with family and friends, less pure, more work, but necessary, I received it. I need it with a partner, a special friend, someone who desires intimacy with every fiber of their being as I do. I want to receive it. The question of intimacy is best understood by defining what it means, here are a few different thoughts from a few different sources:

Eric Berne says "Intimacy is a game free relationship."

Keith Miller says, "In an intimate relationship one feels safe to reveal hopes, dreams, fears, the past-including one's sins and mistakes. These things can be shared without the fear of being judged, condemned, or straighten out."

Scott Peck tells us that intimacy is "the will to extend one's self for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth."

Keith Miller again says that "Intimacy happens when two people walk into each others imaginations, each actually penetrating the secret places of each other's heart and minds."

Can I really have all that? I hope that I can. I know that I want to. So the battle rages and the Journey begins and I walk down the road of vulnerability towards the gates of intimacy. I know that the first step is vulnerability. There are many obstacles on the road, many doubts, failed attempts at intimacy which hit you like a ton of bricks, fear, abandonment, lies, half truths, all are out there on the road. All must be dealt with and shared and explored. It's quite a journey but one of necessity if we chose to walk in health.

So I give myself, my all, to this journey. I am not alone on this road I know the Lord is there…and so Let's take a walk.

Questions? Ask Bob